I cannot say again how amazing life can be.

If anyone asked me, 3 years ago,
while I was in JC,
if I'd see myself sitting at subway for hours on a saturday night
chatting with none other than honeybunny,
I'd laugh in their face,
and I'd laugh so hard,

I'd drown the person in my very toxic saliva.

But that was what I did last night.

We came to a decision to meet up last night on friday night.
I had my reservations at first,
cos,
althoh I thot we cld get along pretty well,
he is far from being my chit-chat buddy,
and I've never ever gone out with him alone b4.

But I was so glad I met up with him.
I cldn't haf had a better program to spend my sat evening.

We just chatted,
from funny updates abt our lives,
amusing stuff abt JC days,
bitchy things abt pple we know,
to plans for the future,
to even serious issues like politics and current affairs.

And last night,
I suddenly caught a glimpse of the old honeybunny that I used to know.

Honeybunny became honeybunny when...
if memory serves me,
sab had her moment of genuity.
He used to be honeybunnIES,
twice his size,
if not triple, in JC.

"I'm not kidding. When I take pictures with my mum, I look like I cld eat her"
That frank declaration of his says it all.

And althoh he failed miserably in the looks department,
he aced the personality.
It's not easy to be endearing and caustic at the same time.
But he was.

I liked him better when he was honeybunny.

After he shed all that weight.
I felt like he shed the "honey" off the bunny.
He became confident,
smooth,
and I really didn't like the way he behaves sometimes,
especially when it comes to the way he talks abt girls or relationships for tt matter
althoh it's hard to put a finger on the exact spot,
cos,
he still speaks like the guy we all know and haf all come to love,
infusing the appropriate amt of humor in it to negate the sting in his comments.
Witty as usual,
but just lacking that extra sth.

I was very surprised tt he noticed tt he changed.
Even more plesantly surprised tt he genuinely wanted to know if tt's true.

I wld never forget that day in the library when my friends n I were mugging for some silly history test,
and he just walked over to our table,
sat himself down beside me and just asked.

"So,how was ur day?"

It was really a very simple question.
But I was touched.
I told him I felt like he really cared.
Sometimes, it really is the simple things that say the most abt a person.

And I told him tt last night.
Something flashed in his face.

I'd like to think of it as the light of enlightenment.

He told me that he knew that he is different now.
And a part of him knew that the old him is better,
but deep down inside,
he likes the him now,
even thoh he knows tt he is a thorough jerk now,
(althoh he'll never admit abt the jerk part)

That struck a chord in me.
I guess it's sth tt always happens to fat pple who slimmed down.
Many pple do not know this,
but it is traumatic being fat in s'pore.
It's a pressure,
an unsaid burden that one has to shoulder all by himself.

Noone knows wat it's like to be up in the hall sweating ur ass off with pple who r in the same shape as u,
while the rest of the world,
the normal population socialise in their beautiful elite circle in the canteen.

What abt how it feels when u stand in the middle of a crowded bus?

Or sitting in a train and noone takes the sit beside u?

It isn't becos pple judge u cos ur fat,
althoh sometimes, it is bcos of that.
But even if it is,
it's not as bad as the neutral reason that there's simply not enuf space.

Feelin like the scum of the earth,
whose every breath is contaminating the oxygen of others,
that's how bad it was.

And althoh they say that everyone is equal
everyone certainly is not.
There are different privileges,
different tacit social rules governing the normal beautiful pple,
and the "others".

Fat and ugly people r not entitled to the privilege of dating,
or love for that matter.

So when the pounds are gone,
it's only right that they take their place in society.

Everything changes when the weight is gone.

Reality,
it doesn't change,
cos they've always lived under the knowledge.
What makes them different is that they are able to see beyond that facade of reality into the reality beyond, and manipulate it to their advantage.

It's called making up for lost time.

Others call it revenge.

I call it a great conversation.
And I loved every single second of it.

Last night,
he also dealt me a wake-up call.

In a half-joking manner,
when he asked what I was studyin in SIM,
I told him business,
because I haf no idea what I wanted to do in the future.

He started sharing abt his future plans
and his outlook on the economy and the impact of the increasingly global world.

I was impressed.
I was downright ahamed of myself.

He made me realise,
besides the resemblence to nageb,
the difference between the high-flyers
and the hard workers who are forever stuck in their lowly positions and measly pay.

He made me realise,
that breeding makes a hell lot of difference.

Opportunities,
mentality,
thoughts.
I swear,
they are so different.

And it suddenly struck me how similar he is to ah boy and a certain Mr Chan.

It's breeding.
It's what results from being born and bred by a highly-educated family who values education
and who really plans long-term and thinks macro,
instead of focusing on the daily struggles of bread and butter.

We had sandwiches for dinner.
It was a simple dinner.

But it was a damn satisfying one.