I wanted to catch up on my readings today.
I wanted to wake up early to jog today.

I really did,
intend to do both those things today.

But mummy was on leave.
And since I took on this part-time job,
and since sch started,
I feel like I haven't seen her enough
haven't talked to her enough.

I miss my mum.

So this morning,
we went out for traditional chinese breakfast at a coffeeshop.

gai si mee, wanton soup, and teh-o

in a hot,
stuffy coffeeshop,
noisy chatter.

But somehow,
I'm oblivious to all these.

It's just mummy and me,
just like when I was a little kid.

I accompanied her all ard our little cosy,
nothing-to-do neighbourhood,
to the wet, slimy market,
to the dry, air-conditioned supermarket,
to all the aunty places.

She bought durians.

And we sat down on the floor of our little,
but clean kitchen floor,
and like little kids,
enthusiastically pry open the stubborn shells.

She refused to let me open the shells.
She says that I might hurt myself.

Listening to that,
makes me feel like an over-indulged kid.

Happiness can be that simple :)

Things always happen whenever I take cab alone.

As usual,
I smiled as I entered the cab.

I always take the front seat if I'm taking a cab alone.
My mother once said to me tt if pple were to drive u,
sitting in the backseat is rude,
as if u r treating the person as ur personal driver.

So I sat in the front seat.

He was lounging in his seat,
his ample belly rising above his belted pants,
was resting comfortably in the space between the steering wheel and the pedals.
He has a nice, harmless face,
bespectacled, and sparse hair.

This uncle started telling me about his previous passengers.

He said that before he came to pick me up,
he was driving this sexy lady to a pub,
and the lady invited him to join her.

She offered to pay him $25 bucks an hour to wait for her and then drive her back.

"Woah!!!Uncle, then why didn't do so? Then no need so xin ku!!"

He gave me a shocked expression

"No lah!!Nowadays ah, ladies fall in love with men very easily one u noe?Later she fall in love with me ah...don't want lah!!!"

I burst out laughing.

"Eh!Young lady, don't laugh ok?!I'm serious!!Especialy young ladies like u fall in love with me very easily one u noe?!!!"

I laughed harder, while nodding my head.

Then I realised that he wasn't joking.

He was dead serious.

I turned to take in his profile again.

I didn't make a mistake the first time round.

He is still balding
old and bespectacled
his belly is still inflated like a hot-air balloon.

Young ladies like me fall in love with him!!!!??????

NEVER!!!!!!!!!

In a bid to further convince me,
he proceeded to state examples.

"Last time ah, I used to send this Hong Kong lady to work every morning ah,
then she will bring me breakfast everyday.
After that ah, she asked me play mahjong with her u noe?"

"Uh-huh~But like what u said, she's from HongKong, maybe she was lonely-"

"Lonely!!!"he sputtered, "she gave me her apartment keys u noe?Then she even asked me to go Europe with her, she pay for me u noe!!!"

!!!!Is this guy serious?

"Really? Did u go?"

"No lah!THis kind of thing.... later she wanna marry me, how?"

........Hurhur.....

"How old is she?"

"20+ lidat....Young lady, very pretty u noe?"

I smiled weakly.

"Then there was this other lady, Malay girl, she very young only. I also every morning send her to work. Then u know ah, Malays ah, every morning, the whole family will send her down, bring me curry puffs lah, putu mayam lah, nasi lemak lah, for breakfast u noe?"

"That's very nice of them. Maybe they were just being friendly?"

"Friendly?Hmmph!!No lah!!One mornin ah, the father came and said to me, "son, I wanna talk to u" I got scared u noe? Why the father wanna tok to me? You know what he asked me or not?"

He looked at me.

"Errr....u like my nasi lemak?"I made a wild guess.

He looked at me smugly

"No. He told me that I am a very nice man, and if I can ah, marry his daughter"

No wayyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!

"How old are u?"he suddenly asked me.

"Oh, I'm 25. I'm married with 2 kids, so don't worry, I won't fall for u."

He nodded.

"25 yrs old married already ah!!So young!!But good lah, good lah. Girls ah, no need to be so choosy. Find a good man like me can marry already"

!!!!!Hello??!!!Good men do not kiss-and-tell and flaunt their exploits!!

"Are u married?"

"Me?No lah!!Very hard to find a girl that I like.Somemore nowadays girls like to throw themselves at me. I don't like, very irritating."

*slaps hand to forehead*

"Yah, u can drop me here.Thanks, I need a receipt, uncle."

He turned on the light, and printed me a receipt.

"Wah, u give birth to 2 kids already ah? Nowadays ladies ah, can't tell. Married young ah? "

I smiled.

"Drive safe~" I said before closing the door.

"Wait wait wait!!U want me to come fetch u again 2ml?Same time?"

"Err...It's ok. My husband usually comes and fetch me. Today the car broke down."

Goodness!!!I have no wish to become another of his "stories"

*shudders*

Traumatizing.

I think,
when pple get older,
thoughts and feelings get complicated.

I think,
when pple get older,
life gets more stressful.

I think,
when pple get older,
they tend to put distance,
and are more apprehensive towards opening up themselves and accepting new friendships.

I think,
as pple mature,
trust becomes an elusive concept
and deception becomes a part of an everyday facade.

I think pple get more and more pathetic as they grow up.

In sociology,
they have this theory of "self presentation"
whereby according to the theory,
pple present themselves,
take on role expectations in order to convince their "audience"
that they are what they want the audience to believe they are.

I was doing that on Sat when I went to my OG gathering.

There was this one time,
on the way home,
probably due to the effects of alcohol,
that I just opened my big mouth and confessed to the person walking beside me
that
I was not looking forward to the gathering at all,
because I was afraid of being left out.

I hated the feeling of being left out.
Probably because it's been so damn long,
I forgot what it exactly feels like.
I just know tt it's a damn horrible feeling.
It makes one wonder and self-question about one's own character.

is there something wrong with me?
what did i do wrong?
why?

She said to me, surprised,
"Is it? I thought u got along very well with them!
U looked like u enjoyed urself"

I felt tonnes better.

Perhaps it is not the being left out part that I detest.
Perhaps it's the "pple-see-me-as-being-left-out" part,
that I truly don't like.

I was merely playing a role.

And it struck me that,
so far,

I've been merely playing a role in uni.

And it struck me that,
often,
educational institutes are the most cruel.

He dropped down on the seat beside her and sighed heavily,
then he turned to her and said

"I don't know what she wants.She keeps blowing hot and cold"

Resigned,
she closed her notes and prepared to take on the role of aunt agony.

He spilled the story.

Apparently,
he has been hangin out with too many of his female friends,
too many times,
and the lady is kinda pissed.

She tried to explain the female psyche to him.

"You see,
this may not be a bad thing.
It doesn't mean tt she's not interested.
The thing is,
she was more open with u in the past because
well,
she might have the impression tt ur heading somewhere,
that she's special to u.
Then, now,
when she gets the idea tt u haf ALOT of female frens,
it's natural tt she wants to retreat, for fear of embarrassing herself
Just make her feel special again, all will be well"

She was such a great fren,
sh spent close to half an hour
"mothering" him back to his usual cheery self.

15 minutes later,
15 minutes into the lecture,
he turned towards her and said

"I think later when we go for the Roslyn talk, we don't sit together...can?"

WAT THE HELL!!

"I don't want her to misunderstand when she sees us together.
Later u walk in 1st then I walk in.
Pretend we don't know each other can?"

WAT THE F***?!!!

"So u intend to throw me to sit alone in the talk?What a great friend!"

Well,
at least he had enough conscience in him to look embarrassed.

Well,
at least he makes sure that I won't get slapped with a 3rd party label.

Guys.

I'm so thoroughly disgusted.

Where the hell is ur backbone, man?!!!
Excuse me!
When I said assure her and make her feel special,
I didn't mean tt u shd alienate ur friends can?!!!!

What,
Am I supposed to go into hiding if she happens to be around the corner?

ARGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

IDIOTS!!!

So this is how the story goes.

I just alighted from the train at Dhoby Ghaut station
and I spotted,
someone alighting from the opposite car.

She was wearing a super tight red spag,
supposedly to emphasize her ample bosom,
to me, it emphasized her great great tummy and huge chicken wing arms ,

anyway,
what caught my attention wasn't her ample bosom,
or any of her other body parts for that matter.

what made me stare,
and stare again,
was the green apple core in her hand!

Green apple core!!

What kind of inconsiderate brute would carry and eat an apple in the train?

Anyway, I stepped onto the escalator,
and she was one step behind me,
dangling the green apple core on her left hand,
which was resting on ther hand rail.

I shifted my hand further from hers.
I don't want the green apple core,
coated with her saliva to brush against my hand accidentally.

So we reached the top of the escalator,
thoughts of her out of my mind.

I walked towards towards the machine to tap my ez link card.
I opened my bag to rummage for my ezlink card.

I stopped in mid-way.

Just stopped in the middle of nowhere,
bag half-opened,
hand paused in mid-motion,

eyes wide opened in shock.

The sticky wet green apple core was staring right back at me.

Oh my god.......

I just stood there for a full minute staring disbelievingly at my bag.

I didn't know whether to laugh or to cry.
The urge to laugh was overwhelming,
overwhelmingly so that it overtook the urge to cry.

So I just smiled all the way to the office.

It ended there.

I reached the pantry,
and took out my soci notes.

And I stared at it disbelievingly for a full minute again.

The whole freaking paragraph was so smudged I cldn't decipher a single word.

&*^^%^#*&^^

Oh my god!!!!!
I fully understand why some pple could commit murder.

I strongly believe in karma.

I believe that there's this natural cycle that exists in this warped world that we live in,
I believe that this is what makes our world less insane

Therefore,
I strongly believe that if the green apple core can find it's way into my bag,

bird shit will find it's way into her eyes one sunday at lucky plaza.

I strongly believe in that.

Ah hah!
:)

Welcome to today's episode of

rallegrare in Italia!!!!

benvenuto benvenuto!
Today we bring you to this cosy restaurant located at a little corner in Bukit Timah.

Welcome to Ristorante Italiano!

Now for the menu,

wat a spread!!!! No wonder the hosts love it so much, they fancy themselves as cows!!

"If grass tastes so good,I wldn't mind moo-ing for the rest of my life!!"cooed the enthusiastic Miss devilangel and Miss toothfairy.

The pricing is not cheap thoh. But then again, as the saying goes

"Cheap no good, good no cheap!!!!Ai(3) pi(1) ai(3) qi(1) ai(3) dua(3) liab(4) ni(1)!!"

So anyway, while the hosts savour the gourmet delights of this restaurant,

the diligent camera crew spotted a certain Portugese footballer....

Look who we found?A gone-back-in-time-Figo!!!
Eh????Signor Figo, I think ur workin in the wrong restaurante!!Ur Portugese!!

With that surprising discovery, we've come to the end of today's episode of
rallegrare in Italia!!!!

To sum up, it is delizioso,celeste!!!

One note of advice thoh.
To avoid any unnecessary costs,
when asked the kind of water preferred,

PLEASE

Just say NORMAL ice water.

Right folks, that's all for today!

Hope U had as much fun watchin as we had doing the program.

Try out the food someday ya?

Stay tuned to the next episode!

*****Next episode features a more affordable Italian dining place*********

I woke up with a start.

It wasn't a particularly scary dream,
just very eerie,
the kind that leaves goosebumps down ur arms.

I dreamt tt a colleague and I boarded this cab,
the exact same cab tt I boarded for real last night,
a mercz cab.
Probably that's why I was so freaked out.

The cab uncle had a sinister look about him,
not the least bit decent.
And he was quiet,
despite my best efforts at conversation.
So I just turned towards my colleague who was sharing the cab with me
and we started chatting.

We were so engrossed in our chatter that we hadn't realised tt the cab uncle actually drove us
to an area shrouded with wilderness.

It was dark all around,
all that we cld see are trees,
trees,
and more trees,

nothing but trees.

He continued drinving.
Silence perpetrated the cab.

We asked him where he was taking us,
he just kept quiet,
and drove us into a maze formed by tall bushes.

He took many turns and bends in the dark green maze.

And then suddenly,
he reached my colleague's place.
She checked the meter.

Only slightly over $5, inclusive of booking fees.

"Tt's really cheap!"she commented happily before alighting.

As usual, the cab uncle did not reply.

We continued the journey to my place in silence.

I checked the meter before alighting,
and was surprised to find tt there wasn't any increase in the fare.

I asked for a receipt,
he printed me one,
in silence.

I paid him.
As I always tell the cabby uncles to drive safe,
before alighting,
I told him tt too.

This time,
he actually looked up and smiled a tiny mocking smile at me.

I panicked,
I opened the door and left.

Before I took the stairs to my place,
something made me turn around to take a last look at the weird cab and the driver.

And what I saw woke me up from my dream.

I saw the driver "driving off" with Zee in the backseat.

It waved to me.

It drove off in thin air.

Just two figures in a sitting position,
suspended in thin air,
cruising out of my carpark.

I wonder what it means.
I hope it means nothing.

*shudders*

I ran into someone on msn the other day.

He reminded me

of things I never knew before him,
of the foolishness of youth,
and the innocence of ignorance.

He taught me that the bitter aftertaste of regret stems from fear,
and fear comes from seeing an ugly side of myself that I never knew existed.

He brings back memories
of coy shyness,
of pretty blushes
and girlish giggles,

of expectations
and shattered illusions.

No, I no longer ache,
he no longer has the power to make my eyes tear,

No longer has the ability to make me me feel like
a thousand clammy fingers are squeezing my chest
till I struggle for breath

But he does still know the way to make my disobedient heart palpitate in an irregular rythm.

I told him tt I was learning the guitar sometime back,
I told him tt it is now lying in a corner despondently,
neglected.

He made me a voice call,
then played and sang me parts of a song tt I cld not recognise.

I used to be able to recognise every song tt he plays and sings.
I used to share the same taste in music as him.
I used to share so many things as him.
I used to think I know him.

It doesn't matter tt I did not recognise the song,
I didn't even recognise him at all.
Maybe I never knew him at all.

All of him that I was acquainted with were merely wishful illusions.

He says that I look happy.

I told him that I try to live happily.

He said alot of things,
alot of things
which just came and went in my fogged mind

and all that I can remember,
all that is familiar,

is that deep voice at the other end,
and the melodious sound of an acoustic guitar.

That hasn't changed.
Maybe it never will.

This is how uni works:

U go to school alone,
en route to class u better be sure ur eyes r open big big.

Then when u finally spot someone ur remotely acquainted with,
u act like he or she is ur bestest friend in the whole wide world,

smile like he/she is ur lover,
link arms and laugh like u've just heard the funniest joke in ur entire life,
and self intro urself to whoever he/she is with.

Then u throw them the most important question in the world.

"Eh!I got lesson at 1.30!U haf?"

and if they reply in the affirmative,
confirm tt both of u r having the same class,

and there...

U've found ur new bestest fren in the whole world.

Tt's what happened the other day.

Happily, after class,
I went to the canteen to look for my friends to lunch with.

Ooh!!There's someone new at the table!!

And I happened to have no company for IBM.

Hahaha.Great~Time to socialise.

I rubbed my hands in glee and self-introed myself.

We kinda clicked,
at least for awhile.

"Eh D**yl!Don't do anything funny with my fren during the lecture hoh.
She wants her first class honors de!" my idiot friend teased.

ok, so the both of us headed off to class,
found a seat and settled down.

I was sitting on his left,
so he saved a seat to his right,
and asked me

"Do U know T-Vis?He's also P**l's fren.He'll be joining us later"

So, ok, I thought, fine, no problem.

Afterall, what problem cld there be?

Tt was before the problem appeared.

"This is T-Vis, she's (my name)"

I was struggling to get my notes in order,
and upon hearing my name,
I turned and naturally smiled and said hello.

But before the "hello" escaped my lips,
I choked on my breath.

And somehow, I cld only stare.

Thank goodness,
my fren's fren was sitting in between us,
I wldn't know how much more I'd disgrace myself if he hadn't acted as a bulwark.

There, before me,
is the most gorgeous male species I've ever been introduced to.

and he smiled.

I think my heart stopped beating for a full 2 minutes.

Forget Mr.X ok.

T-Vis is tall, lean, dark and handsome.

The stuff dreams are made of.

Oh my god.

And now, even thinking about it,
just recalling the simple fact tt I was introduced to this gorgeous creature,

*falls back onto the chair, throws head back and giggles*

Ok,
thing is,

what propelled me into this crazy bimbotic state is not the fact tt he is drop-dead gorgeous.

Ok, the fact tt he is drop dead gorgeous does play a part as well,
of cos

*smiles*

but,

BUT!!

It's the incredulity of the whole situation.

It's not everyday tt I get introduced to a breath-stopping hunk u noe?

and how many times in life do u get introduced,
to formally be acquainted with someone of that quality?

It is tt unbelievable factor tt makes it tt memorable.

Something small,
something insignificant,
but yet,

it's strangely special in an unexplanable way.

So tt's the story with Mr. T-Vis.

He is,
I know I've already said this a thousand times,
but he is good-looking.

National Day was just over.

Some pple might have already heard this,
but just allow me to share with u,
my wonderful Tuesday at sch.

:)

2 days ago,
I was in school.

I had just arrived,
stepped off the bus,

Woo!One "spanish footballer" breezed past me.

Cool~Nice jersey, I thought, grinning to myself.

I took the stairs to the third floor,
opened the door,

woo!Another "Spanish footballer" walked past.
(It's not the same one.)

Hur.

I tried to navigate my way around,

Waaaaa~a "man u footballer" was around the corner,
lounging against a pillar.
(at least I think it's man u.Red jersey, vodaphone)

Wat's up man!

I finally found my way to class,
parked my butt between two friends,
looked up and

!!!!!!

I gasped.
The friend sitting beside me,
turned to look at me, "What?"

I groaned, then turned to him.

"Spain jersey, again!And bloody hell!This one thinks he is Fer is it!"

"Wat fur?"

"Tsk!There!!Just 2 rows in front, the one with torres at the back!*&^%^%$#^%$-"
he slapped his hand over my mouth

"U r very loud eh, Miss!"

My eyeball shifted to where he was looking.

uh-oh.

The torres-impersonator was lookin at my direction.

Hurhur.

So much for keeping a low profile.
So much for turning over a new leaf.

I smiled apolegetically at him.

I spent the rest of the lecture glaring at his back.
I was hoping tt,
u noe,
there is some truth in the very famous saying of

"staring holes at his back"
or
"staring daggers"

hopefully he will drop dead and die,
or sth lidat.

"U want me to go over and tear the jersey off his back?"

"Are u mocking me?U wanna die isit?"

He chuckled.

Well, at least it shut him up.

Anyway,
while my fren was silently laughin at me,
while I was busy contemplating ways to do bodily harm to that ugly,
self-deluded guy,
(I mean, if it were Mr. T-vis wearing it, I'd just melt.)
a thought just occurred to me.

And I started laughing to myself.

Yes, Mr Ting was doing demand and supply up in front,
and yes,
I know I've said it many times before tt I'm aiming for a 1st class honors,
but,
it just suddenly struck me,
why all those football jerseys are all around sch.

National Day.
Eve.

Singaporeans are one bunch of amazing pple,
I tell u.

To display to the world how much we love our countries,
we don red.

We wear the SPAIN jersey,
and ENGLAND's man u jersey.

And we walk ard proudly,
patriotically.

So much for patrioticism.

Lol~

Singapore must be so proud of her citizens.

Somehow,
I know it sounds absurd,
but,
somehow,
such a ridiculous behavior feels so comforting to me.

In a way tt I can't explain,
it just feels like a very singaporean thing to do.

Lol~

*smiles*

Wat can I say?
Kit Chan says it better.

This is home,
truly.
Where i know i must be,
where my dreams wait for me.......

P.S. Never let it be said tt I don't haf a sense of humour.
Guess what I wore to work yesterday? *silly grin*

Oh yeah,abt Mr. T-vis,he's another short story.
Update another day abt him.Haha~