"So how's ur virgin experience?" He asked.

"ok lah"

"Huh?ok only ah?"

The next thing I know,
I had a jug of Ribena Vodka thrusted into my hands.

"Drink"

And that about summed up my 1st clubbing experience.

One of the guys will ask abt my "virgin experience",
I'll give a non-commital ans,
and I'll have different variations of vodka thrust into my hands
and ordered to drink.

Either that,
or they'll cheat at the finger-guessing game to get me to drink.

So in case anybody's wondering,
I drank a lot last night.
And no,
I wasn't drunk.

I remembered perfectly how I got hm,
and no,

I do not haf some hideous-looking stranger waking up in bed beside me.

And I am VERY surprised that my threshold for alcohol is THAT high.
Among the 8 of us,
I think we finished abt 12 jugs.

After last night,
I've also a newfound respect for sardines.

I never knew how uncomfortable those fishes are,
squashed so tightly in the can.

Can u imagine if they are alive?

I am beginning to think that clubs and dance floors are created
for the sole purpose of letting meat-eaters have a taste of what it's like to be fishes.

Sardines especially.

And yes,
of cos,
I've never seen so many gd-lookin pple in my life.

Or maybe it's just dark and smoky.

*shrugs*

And I've never been as disappointed in the human race.

The pple are great-looking,
the music is cool,
everything is right.

Yet somehow,
it all feels ugly.

Too much body contact,
too much alcohol,
too much heat,
too many succinct glances,
too many suggestive gestures.

Too...morally lax.

It feels like a license to cheat.

It feels as if,
once ur in a club,
u get to toss aside all ur responsibilities,
forget what is right and wrong.

Everything is acceptable.

It is a wonderful state to be,
sure.

It is so wonderful that one can get drunk on that feeling,
one can definitely get addicted to it.

I know I can.

Yeah, I enjoyed the bash last night,
definitely,
or i wldn't haf stayed till the club closed.

But somehow,
it depresses me.

Maybe it's the "nothing really matters" feel u get when ur in a club,
it's the feelin of absolute nonchalence.

Maybe it frightens me.

Maybe it scares me that so many pple actually enjoy this feeling of nonchalence.
Maybe it scares me to know that as pple grow up,

They grow cold.

Maybe that's why I've never clubbed.

Maybe I cld guess what's behind those smoky doors.

Ok,
in case anybody's wondering wat I was doing during the many days lapse,
U can check out my spokesperson's blog

http://lifegoesonmyway.blogspot.com/

She loves me so.

Just check out the 4th july,29th june,28th june entry.

U'll find my funny updates there.

You know, it is funny how the human mind works.

We begin by loving birthdays.

Remember the long ago times when we look forward to our birthdays so...
we begin counting down to them 2 months in advance and
dropping overt hints to all our friends?

And then,
we move on to the stage whereby we start to realise that our yearly day is approaching a month before,
and begin to keep our mouths shut
cross our fingers and pray that certain pple remember it.

And then finally,
it will come to a time when birthdays are nothing more than reminders of our stay on earth
and a measure as to how close (or far) we are from achieving our goals in life.

And of cos,
an excuse for others' (sadistic) pleasures
(don't worry, footages will appear soon,u pervertic idiots!).

This year,
I've hit the big TWO-O.
N no, sadly, spain did not do a 2-nil to France (Hello Toothfairy!!!R u doing ur job?)

Anyway!!!!

Sadly sadly,
as if spain and portugal's lost to France were not enuf,
the toothfairy decided to score a hat trick against me and
give me another thing to mark my special day.

The dreaded reminders of age.

It all began on my special day,
4th July.

U see, my colleagues decided to be sweet
and surprised me with a cake.
And we were only like, acquainted for a week plus.
I was so incredibly touched!!!!
I was prepared to weep at their feet and jump thru rings of fire for them.
And then the very next day, when we were at KTV,
one of my colleagues,
let's call him Mr. S suddenly leaned towards me and asked

"U are twentyyyyyyyy-?"

"Twenty.just twenty.Not twentyyyyyyyyyy-? U guys celebrated my bday yesterday, remember? 2 big candles?" I replied, annoyed.

"Oh yah!!!I thought u were 21!!!"he laughed.

I glared at him.

He laughed harder

"Hey!!!Some of them thot u were 22!!!In fact, they wanted to take 2 candles, just in case. We had such a hard time at the cake shop deciding whether or not to take 1 or 2 small candles!!!"

At that moment in time,
I almost wished I had those rings of fire to shaft down their throats.
Every freakin one of them.

And I dun really care that those guys have to-die-for voices!!!

Then on Friday,
I was strollin around marina sq with bbm zee.
And I was tellin her wat Mr S told me on wed.

She burst out laughing.

"Yah!Yah!Yah!!"She agreed vehemently,
"I almost quarrelled with the guys in the pantry cos they dun believe tt ur only 20!!They insisted on putting the small candle!!!"

Boys can be such dumbasses.

ASSHOULES!!!!

Then later in the evening,
I finally met up with a friend I haven't seen in centuries.
He is two years my junior and currently in Poly.

"U are twenty already. Better start clubbing b4 it's too late to start. U dun haf tt many years left"

tt was during dinner.

"I am so old!!" he complained when desert was served.

Well, if ur old, wat does tt make me?

*scowls*

And then, as if tt wasn't enuf to remind me of what an antique I've become,
he spent the rest of the evening teaching me how to pronounce
the new slangs that are all the rage among young pple now.

"Srsly"he said.

"siirsly" I repeated.

"No!!!Still too long!!Shorter!!it's just S-R-S-L-Y.Srsly!"he repeated for the thousandth time.

I really did practice.
But

I JUST CAN"T GET IT!!!!!

ARGHHH!!!!

And just earlier on tonight,
even the cab uncle collaborated with whatever grand scheme the toothfairy had for me.

"Aiya!!Ur already married!!Go home late so what?"

Hello!!!! Since when do married women look the way I do?!!!

Sometimes,
a girl just has no choice but to lapse into depression.

Happy birthday to me.

c'est foutu~

Such
Sweet
Sorrow...

I was almost convinced that zizou and gang has sth against me.

Twice, they drove out my favouraite teams.

First El nino and espanol,
then Figo and my egg tarts.

Hello!!!Stop it already!!!!

BBM mu asked me how I managed to swallow Spain's loss.

Well, I guess u cld see how long I took to come to terms with it.
(I'm only blogging abt it now,OKAY?)

I told her tt actually,
Spain's loss was easier to stomach.

I kept faith all the way,
even until the 90th minute,
I refuse to believe tt my wonderful fer wldn't work a miracle.
I refuse to believe tt with the way ramos was chionging,
magic wldn't happen.

I never stopped believing.

Even so,
I guess,
deep deep in the dark recesses of my wrenched heart,
I knew it was a goner right from the start.

I teared when france scored the equaliser.
I sobbed and screamed in disbelief when Vierra scored the second.
Then stunned into silence when Zizou brought home the 3rd one.

Despite my newfound love for the spanish team,
and my very inexperienced soccer experience,
I have to admit tt zidane is one hell of a player.

I was devastated.

And the whole world knows it.
(Thank u to those who actually called, msged, or consoled me in person)

But it was easier to stomach than the Portugese defeat cos,
I've gotta admit,
Spain did not play well tt nite.
(I'm still loving my Spain jersey thoh
and I'm still proud to wear it, mind u.)

I know what everyone's saying abt Cristiano and the rooney thing.
But seriously, english fans,

WAKE UP LAH!!!

Did u think tt anything wld've been diff had rooney been there?

Stop putting the blame on others when the team is lousy.

Just days before the match,
Miguel (My trainer, not the portugese defender) was laughing at me when I told him tt portugal will kick england's ass.

He asked

"Do u seriously think tt portugal has a remote chance of winnin when Deco is not playing?"

"Yes!!I believe tt Figo and Ronaldo are enuf to demolish the English team."

He laughed.

"It's all politics. Ronaldo will not play. Just look at who's paying his salary."

Ronaldo did play.
And I was glad tt he did.
I wld've despised him had he betrayed his country for his club.

Yes, I do love Gerrard,
I do love Terry,
and I do love Ferdinand.
My heart aches for them when the camera captured their faces and tears.

But honestly,
Portugal deserved the win,
the penalties were genuine.

Ricardo was brillient.

They deserved tt victory as much as France undeserved theirs.

Portugal's defeat was hard to swallow.
I'm still feeling indignant now.
And I'm still convinced tt tt referee is Rooney's gay partner.

They must have conspired to grant Henry tt dishonourable penalty.
And rob Cristiano of the one he shd've rightfully been given when tt detestable French fry shoved him,
when he cld've header in tt goal in the penalty area.

Both teams played excellently well,
and had France scored another goal on their own,
or had Portugal played worst,
I wld'nt haf felt so indignant.

To my horror,
my eyes actually burned towards the end of the match
when Ricardo actually moved forward to aid the team.
Portugal really fought so damn hard.

And it's Figo's last international match.

Portugal lost,
not becos they weren't gd enuf.

They lost,
bcos the referee was Rooney's gay partner.

I cried,
again,
not becos Portugal didn't manage to win.

I cried,
because Figo deserves this so much more than Zidane.

I cried,
becos I saw what it means to play as a team.

I cried,
bcos even with all these,
Portugal cldn't win,

even with the right qualities,attitudes,
they cldn't beat an unfair outside factor.

I cried,
bcos I had to see a great man embrace another great man at the end of the match,
exchange shirt,
and really display the greatness of a great man.

No blame,
no harsh words,
no fighting, like the young guns,
just a sincere embrace,
a genuine love for the sport,
a pure respect for each other,
a quiet, yet strangely powerful picture.

Figo is really just great.

And most of all,
I just cried for him.

Please Portugal,
just give figo a consolation 3rd placing.

Please
please
please
please